012 : 5 Steps To Creating A Thriving Relationship -


012 : 5 Steps To Creating A Thriving Relationship

February 14, 2018

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be that 1% podcast

Hey there, I'm James Silvas. Host of the Be That 1% Podcast and Peak Performance Coach. 

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Welcome to the Be That 1% Podcast Experience!

Happy Valentine’s Day!

Our goal for this episode is to share some insights that will help you create the foundation for a strong relationship that’s constantly growing and moving in the same direction. We share some stories about our own relationship and bring you in on how we’ve built our lives together.

And if you’re not in a relationship we think this is a powerful episode to listen to especially if you want to be in an amazing relationship one day, this episode will shed some light on things you can be doing now to better align with the type person you want in your future.


“Similarities create the attraction and the differences creates the passion.” – James Silvas


Key Take Aways 

  • Uncover how James & Amanda have step up their relationship
  • How the first step is actually step zero
  • Moving from superficial to committed
  • Align your values, goals and visions with your partners
  • What a growth relationship is
  • How step ZERO is the foundation for all relationships and can be done before you even get into one.
  • Don’t wrap up your identity into someone else – make sure you know who you are firmly
  • There are 2 types of relationships
  • 100% of 50% rule
  • The power of similarities and differences
  • Understanding vs. Communication


Quiz Links


Time Stamped Show Notes

(2:40) Start of episode

(3:50) Overview of what the episode will cover

(4:10) Relationship moving from superficial to committed

(5:10) Align your values and goals together

(6:15) James’s mountain story

(9:35) Where Amanda was at in her life when James asked her to become committed

(11:15) Where James ‘picked up’ Amanda and the pick up line he said (Spring 2011)

(13:30) How our growth relationship motivated Amanda to do greater things and challenged her to be better

(15:40) The concept of wanting to be with someone because we don’t want to be alone

(16:05) Step Zero: Getting Clear on who you are and what you want

(16:55) Do not put your identity in another relationship

(19:20) Taking in a relationship instead of giving

(22:00) 2 Types of relationships : completing vs. complimenting

(23:20) Giving 100% of your 50%

(24:00) Step 1: Moving from Superficial to Committed and laying the framework

(27:35) Step 2: Seeking to Understand

(32:30) Ways of feeling comforted as a love language

(33:26) Top Values personally and relationshiply

(35:22) Step 3: Communication Style – Do you want to win or do you want to be in love?

(36:26) Back story of our wedding ‘drama’ and what we learned

(42:15) Step 4: Aligning your values, visions and goals

(46:05) What it’s like being in a relationship and building a business together

(51:50) Recapping the 5 Steps



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