Description: Diamandia Lingos is a consultant, speaker, mentor, athlete and advocate. She’s been on my podcast before, in a powerful and profound two-part series called Rising From the Ashes. You can check those out here (part 1) and here (part 2).
In this episode, we talk about alignment, self worth, trusting the process, goal setting, and enforcing boundaries.
She says, “Invest in yourself, and wherever you are feeling resistance lean into that because that is where you need to do the work.”
What is alignment?
How the pandemic forced her to sit still
Meditation led to clarity
How Diamandia embodied her new identity
New energy, new people
Betting on herself by investing in a coach
How she secured a $50 million real estate deal
Following through, despite fear
Full body yes
It’s not about the “how”, it’s the “who”
Goal-setting – is it important?
Being in-tune with mind/body alignment
Less doing, more being
Self-worth is most important
The answers are within
Everyone should invest in themselves
Connect with Diamandia:
Connect with James:
4:30 How COVID forced her to slow down
How her world of chaos and busyness came to a screeching halt.
“I came back from my first trip from Peru, I had gone into a couple of leadership programs and then COVID hit. And I had come from a lifestyle where I was like running and going and running and pushing and running and pushing and pushing and running. And I was forced to stay still. And I was also in a position with work that I was making money and my job, I was successful, my job, but I was like pushing and it was really starting to feel like heavier. It felt like I was like dragging people across the finish line. I was emotionally exhausting.”
8:00 Speaking, Writing, and Meditating her Affirmations to Embody Them
Diamandia shares the practices she did consistently to embody her new identity and ways of being.
“Now that I was speaking it, I was meditating it. I was writing it and now I was speaking it almost an affirmation type of space. And so I started to embody it. Like I have a specific list of affirmations that I write every day, no matter what I am open and ready to receive all the love and abundance, the universe has to offer me. I am healthy. I’m safe. I’m enough. Like those happen every day, no matter what, but with the journal prompts, it was similar, similar writing, similar person. And it changed because I changed as I became that person.”
10:10 New energy, new people
Diamandia was vibrating at a different level, and therefore attracting different people.
“If I’m having a day where I’m really calm and grounded, like that’s an emotionless process and it really has become about embodying that and you know, ways of being, and I didn’t even understand what ways of being was. I was such a doer, you know, I, I could do anything. I could get a checkup. Completed. I could like handle all tasks and what I started learning by, by embodying these, these affirmations by embodying, who I was becoming, it started radiating this energy. And these are the things that I never believed. I started embodying this, this energy and it just started attracting people who were living and vibrating in this space already. And they started to see me and crazy things started happening.”
13:03 Betting on herself and investing in a coach
She was no stranger to spending money on material items that fed her ego, but when it came time to write the check and invest in a coach, it made her nauseous.
“I found him and I emailed him and I tried to set up a call with him and we chatted and he was like, you know you sound great but you know, I’ve got a 50 person waiting list right now. And I was like, you’re gonna work with me. I have a feeling like I’m not coming from like an egotistical standpoint. I just have this like, grounded feeling that we’re going to work together. And he was like, okay, well give me some time. And he went back and he listened to our podcast. The first one, he called me the next day, When you said, you’re right, you are, we’re going to work together. And I’m going to bump you ahead of the 50 people that I have waiting right now. And we started working together and we were working together for about four weeks. Um, and the process of hiring him was really, really difficult for me. Um, I had done all of this work already.
I had been in the leadership programs, I had gotten approved twice, it was like, it was like happening, but it was a really expensive amount of money for me.Which is funny because I had no problems spending cash on a car a couple months before. Cause my ego wanted the car. But when it came to the paying this high price for a coach, it was like, What’s the return on investment, all the ways that you try to like make excuses for betting on yourself. I literally wanted to throw up when I wrote the check. That awareness of nausea has come up for me in different areas. And I realized that when I want to throw up, it’s something that I actually have to do because I’m resisting it and it’s something I need to step into. So when I wrote that check, it was like I made some consciously, made a deal with myself that it was time to level up and there was no more excuses.”
15:04 How she secured a $50 million real estate deal
She had it within her, but just needed a guide or a mentor to show her “how.”
“He was like I’m going to turn you into a multi-millionaire and I’m going to guarantee that within the next year you’re going to have double digit million dollars in your bank account. And within five years it will be a hundred million. And I was like why. You know, cause I needed to, again, I still needed to hear someone outside me tell me again, why… what they saw in me, what they were seeing in me. And he was just like, you have it. And you just need someone to show you the details. And then within three weeks of signing that contract. I bought a $6.5 million property in Austin, Texas, that I’m developing into a 33 plots single family home development. So yeah, I secured a $15 million real estate deal. Just boom. And it’s, it’s actually making me uncomfortable talking about it because I can’t believe it.”
17:02 Following through, despite fear
James says fear is a natural response that happens when you are out of your comfort zone. He asks Diamandia how she handled fear this time around.
“Well, previous me wouldn’t follow through on the nausea response, on the fear, like I would self-sabotage subconsciously by stalling, stalling, ignoring, not responding, making excuses in my schedule, not prioritizing things like I am really good at being busy. And so I could be busy and not be able to do something that would change my life. You know, and now there’s a level of ownership and if I really want something, I will make it happen. It doesn’t matter. And now that nausea response is like I have to do that. Like I’m not, not doing it. I need to do it. That’s the difference. And I even coach now and I’m like, does it make you want to vomit? Yes. Okay. We have to do that.”
19:00 Full-body yes
James explains the concept of knowing something is in alignment for you based on a full-body yes. He shares his story about the time he did a 61-mile walk about Las Vegas back in 2018.
“Alignment allows you to operate in full body yeses. Which is so vital. And for those of you who haven’t heard of that concept, or this is the first time that you’re kind of hearing the, this type of language, a full body yes. The way I could describe what it’s like for me in the moments that I’ve had them, I’ll give you an example of, of the 61 mile walk that I did around Las Vegas in 2018. That was one of the wildest thoughts that I’d had in a physical realm. It literally went from imagination to my body screaming this has to be done and I didn’t need to check with anybody. I didn’t need to confirm it with Amanda to see if it was okay. I didn’t need to like call my friend, say, Hey, what do you think of this? It was, you’re doing it. And there’s been about maybe five moments that I can distinctly remember. That’s one. Um, Where it’s been that crystal clear.”
25:00 It’s not about the “how”, it’s about the “who”
Diamandia says she used to get stuck in the “how”, when really it was more about who she was and who showed up for her that led to her success.
“I didn’t know how but the how was not even important. And it’s funny. Cause I used to get so stuck in the, how that it would prevent me. And it’s the who, it’s not the how it’s who you are, who you show up as, and then who shows up for you because of how you’re showing up.”
32:50 Goal-setting – is it important?
Diamandia doesn’t set goals anymore, and here’s why.
“I have to be very careful on what I say out loud, because if I speak something it comes into existence. And I know that sounds insane, but it’s been happening so much that I literally have to be very, very careful what I ask for and be very sure of what I actually want before I speak it, because it will happen. And so, like, I really believe in goal setting, but at the same time, I’m in a place where I don’t want to go set it all because I’m like just crazy shot out of a cannon because the goal represents something that may be setting myself too low. Like if you told me last year, what happened? What would happen this year? I would’ve, I would’ve said you’re insane. Like, yeah, this wouldn’t even be on my goal list.”
42:20 Less doing, more being
By focusing less on staying busy, Diamandia has gotten out of her own way, and has been able to lean into her alignment.
“A lot of my learning has been, I don’t have to do everything. I have to delegate. It took me a long time to understand that because. And the less doing that I was that I’m doing. And the more being who I am, the more things have been attracted to me. I’m so much more out of the consistent doing and the pressure of accomplishing the task that I can like lean into my alignment. And being clear on the goals of trying to accomplish it also sounds like because you know, your natural self-sabotaging tendencies that by hiring people to do it and delegating that to them helps you not get into the busy-ness.”
44:40 Self-worth is most important
She explains why this is the driving force behind everything we do, our behaviors, and each decision we make.
“Self-worth is the most important thing that you can have. It is the driver of every decision that you made. It is the definition of who you are. It, it runs your subconscious. It is the boss of you actually like in every way, shape or form. And we don’t even realize it. We, we have no idea that that’s actually running our subconscious mind and growing up the way that I grew up, I did not grow up in a healthy home. A loving home. And I didn’t even realize I didn’t have any self worth.”
51:00 The answers are within me
And radically accepting whatever those answers are.
“I have the answers. I don’t need to search for them anywhere else, but with inside of me and I’m okay with whatever those answers are because they’re coming from a space of complete alignment. And my intention is very clear and how I want to show up.”
51:50 Everyone should invest in themselves
In summary, Diamandia explains that you can wake up and ask “Is my life real? I feel so much joy.”
“I think that everyone needs to invest in themselves because there’s a million zillion reasons. And we don’t have seven hours to go through them, but the most important thing, I think is there is this moment in time where you wake up and you can’t believe that your life is real because you’re filled with so much joy and love for yourself.
You have gratitude to be able to get up and do the things that you get to do that you get paid to do. And everyone should feel that. Every single person should feel so much joy for themselves.”
Rising From the Ashes with Diamandia Lingos part 1
Rising From the Ashes with Diamandia Lingos part 2